Title: Domestic Politics
Summary: Why the Doctor stopped doing domestic.
Rated: PG-13
Notes: *dips experimental foot in new era*






Jo's step faltered a little as they reached the Doctor's laboratory.

"You know what would be nice?" she said as brightly as she could manage, "a cup of tea."

"I could bring you all a mug in there," said Benton helpfully. Jo's smile slipped a little, but he was too far away to be kicked.

"That would be lovely, Sergeant, dear, and bring one for yourself as well."

Jo swallowed her groan, opened the door, and went in.

"And this," she said, "is the Doctor's lab. And that's the Doctor."

"How lovely."

The man himself didn't look up from his experiment.

"This, Doctor," said Jo, as cheerfully as she could manage, "is my mother, Mrs Mary Grant."

Now the Doctor did look up, peering at her mother as if she were a particularly unpleasant kind of monster.

"Lovely to meet you," said Mary. "Josie's told me so much about you."

The Doctor raised his not-inconsiderable eyebrows. "Really," he said.

"Not a word." Jo watched in horror as her mother affectionately squeezed the Doctor's shoulder. "She never calls, she never writes – frankly, if it wasn't for her uncle's reports, I wouldn't even remember I had a daughter. Now," Mary leaned over his workbench, pushing her faded blonde hair out of her face, "what are we doing here? It all looks terribly interesting..."

"Don't touch anything," the Doctor said through gritted teeth. "Jo, if I might have a word..."

Jo allowed herself to be led by the elbow into the corridor.

"Sorry, Doctor," she said, "but my uncle came up on Ministry business, and brought Mummy along to see me, and said I should give her a tour, and the Brigadier looked like he wanted to swallow his moustache, but I couldn't seem to--" She stopped to draw breath. "I really am sorry."

"Well." The Doctor gave her an affectionate look. "I suppose we should go back before she blows us all up."

The lab was empty.

But the door to the TARDIS was standing open.

The Doctor muttered under his breath and marched over to the threshold.

"Mrs Grant?" he called.

Jo's mother's voice floated back, "Oh dear. I seem to have wandered into ... well, you have a lot of cupboard space in these places, that's all I can say."

"UNIT's been very generous," said the Doctor, deadpan.

"Still," Jo's mother emerged, looking as unflappable as ever, "I could certainly use a cup of tea. Where's that nice Sergeant Benton got to?" She gave Jo a significant look, which Jo knew meant, You could do a lot worse, Josie, darling, and 'Josephine Benton' has a nice ring to it. You always did like a man in uniform...

Jo ignored it.

Her mother wandered around the lab, peering and poking and saying things like, "Are you married, Doctor?" and, "It's such a relief to know that Josie's in safe hands with you. I do worry about her, you know, she was always getting into such silly scrapes growing up."

The Doctor, for his part, answered as briefly as possible, and watched Mary as if he was waiting for her to rip off a mask and reveal she was the Master in disguise.

Jo didn't drink her tea; she perched on the edge of her chair and wished the Earth would swallow her whole. The Doctor could probably arrange it, if she asked very nicely. Although, judging from the look on his face, he'd rather her mother was the one swallowed.

The very second her mother's cup was empty, Jo was on her feet.

"Let's go for a walk," she said brightly. "I'll show you around the grounds – the unclassified parts, anyway."

"I'm glad we have a few minutes alone," her mother said as they walked. "I have some news for you."

"Oh?" said Jo.

"Well," her mother twirled a strand of hair around her finger, a habit she had broken in her daughter many years ago. "It's been a few years since your father died. And I missed him dreadfully, of course, but now I've met someone else." Jo realised that her mother was steering her towards the entrance. "And I'm getting married," her mother finished happily.

"That's lovely," said Jo. "Really, I'm so happy – when can I meet him?"

"Right now!" her mother said, and Jo noticed the slim, dark man standing outside the main gate.

He gave her a little wave.

"You've got to be joking," said Jo.

"Josie?"

"Get away from him!"

"Josie!"

The Master smiled and took off his dark glasses. Well, she wasn't falling for that one again. Jo turned on her heel and sprinted back to the building.

"Doctor!" She wrenched open the laboratory door, ignoring his look of irritation. "Doctor, you have to come and stop my mother from marrying the Master."

The Doctor stared at her for a moment. "This," he said slowly, "is why I avoid domestic entanglements."

"Good policy," Jo said. "Could you hurry, please?"

As they ran back to the entrance – closely followed by the Brigadier, Mike, Benton and a handful of soldiers – Jo said, "You know, Doctor?"

"Yes?"

"I'm suddenly not looking forward to Christmas."



end